The Life of a Misunderstood Working Mom

The Life of a Misunderstood Working Mom

Have you ever felt like you don’t quite belong—that even when you do, the people around you just don’t seem to get you? I hear you. I’ve been there. My fiercely independent nature and problem-solving mindset have landed me in trouble more than once. I have an instinct to identify issues and immediately jump into action, even when it’s not my problem to solve. Sound familiar?

This habit stems from years of living in survival mode. In moments of crisis, I shift into a robotic, hyper-efficient version of myself—an amazing skill in emergencies but a challenge in everyday life. This mindset often pushes me to overstep boundaries, taking on tasks that aren’t mine to carry, simply because I feel the need to fix and improve everything around me.

The Burden of Always Having to “Fix Things”

Outside of work and family life, I’ve realized that my need for progress and problem-solving has been my way of seeking approval. This constant “I have the answer to make this better” mentality creates an invisible gap between myself and others. Have you ever felt that way—like your efforts to help aren’t always welcomed?

As mothers, professionals, and caregivers, we get stuck in this cycle. Juggling kids, work, and daily responsibilities, we become so focused on meeting everyone’s needs that we struggle to slow down and truly connect. We’re always moving, always fixing, always striving.

Losing Yourself in the Hustle

In this relentless pursuit of being the perfect mom, employee, business owner, and friend, we often hide parts of ourselves. We suppress emotions, fearing they will hinder our relationships or make us seem weak. But let me tell you—strength is not about how much you can carry; it’s about knowing when to put things down.

The hardest part? Suppressing emotions to “keep it all together.” We don’t lack compassion—we just struggle to show vulnerability. And in doing so, we build walls, not connections. We pour ourselves into work, caregiving, and responsibilities, using them as a shield against rejection and judgment.

Breaking Free From Survival Mode

So how do we break free from this exhausting cycle?

• Recognize the Pattern – Acknowledge when you’re operating in survival mode and challenge yourself to pause.
• Embrace Vulnerability – It’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to show emotion. It’s okay to not have all the answers.
• Prioritize Self-Care – You can’t pour from an empty cup. Give yourself permission to rest. Listen to this Happy Whole You podcast episode on self-care.
• Reprogram Your Mindset – Let go of the need to prove yourself. You are already enough. Read more about mindset transformation here.
• Connect With Like-Minded Women – Community is everything. Join the Happy Whole You community.

You Are Not Alone

If this resonates with you, know this—you are not alone. You are not “too much.” You are not broken. You are doing the best you can, and that is enough.

Let’s redefine what it means to be a successful, thriving woman. Let’s stop living in survival mode and start embracing our authentic selves. Are you ready to take that first step?

Explore more mindset and wellness resources at HappyWholeYou.com.

-Dr. Anna Marie

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